Matthew McConaughey Says He Was Estranged From His Mom for 8 Years: Needed a ‘Mom, Not a Fan’

Matthew McConaughey is opening up about his relationship with his mother. 

During his appearance on the latest episode of the Whine Down with Jana Kramer podcast, the Oscar-winning actor discussed a rough patch he had with his mother, Mary Kathlene McCabe. 

While on the topic of creating clear and healthy boundaries with their mothers, McConaughey shared that he didn’t speak to his mother for eight years at one point. 

“I tried to change my mom,” he told Kramer. “For eight years her and I had an estranged relationship where I couldn’t have more than a conversation of, ‘Hi, Mom, doing good. Love you. Bye.’ Anything she asked me, I couldn’t tell her personally because she didn’t have a governor, she’d go to the press. She showed up on Hard Copy, taking people to my childhood room, showing people, ‘This is where he lost his virginity.'”

McConaughey said that his mom defended her actions by telling him that she didn’t think that people would be paying attention. But according to the Dallas Buyers Club star, his mother was caught up in his fame.

“There were years where I could not talk to her,” he added. “I tried to change her. I need just a mom right now, not a fan and I didn’t have it.”

McConaughey said that he tried to change his mother by testing her to see how much information she would share — a plan he said worked, until it didn’t. 

“What I tried to pull off was I’m going to give you more information to see if I can trust you with it again,” he said. “And it was like quit trying to prove that point, just don’t give it to them. Don’t give them that much. That’s where our relationship is, and let’s make it healthy and fun with what our relationship can handle.”

McConaughey reiterated that their relationship is fine and that there is no “shallow” aspect to it. However, there was a lesson with how to manage people in your life.

“No, it’s not shallow,” he said. “There’s a lot of people, friends and relationships in my life that I think are better, that I have at an arm’s length. We don’t need full, all detail, all access intimacy with all people in our life. There’s some people I like running into, that’s where we’re best.”

According to McConaughey, a big part of their family’s dynamic is humor, which he says his mother used when testing his wife, Camila Alves, at the start of their relationship.

When asked about Alves’ recent comments regarding the “test” his mother put her through, which included calling her by his ex-girlfriends’ names and putting her down, the Mud actor said it was all fun. 

“Camila, my family and part of Camila and I as well, we cherish the value of sense of humor and comedy,” he said. “The stuff she said about my mom, of my mom calling her different names, that right of passage, that initiation, some people were like, ‘Gosh.’ Camila wasn’t wounded about it either. It’s funny for some people. We say this all the time in my family: what tickles us may bruise others.” 

He added, “I’m not changing her, that’s Mom. She was looking out for my feelings, she didn’t know my feelings. But she tested the woman I had the feelings for. And the woman I was in love with went right through it and stood up and said, ‘Hey, Mrs. McConaughey, let me tell you something.’ My mom went, ‘There we go.'”

Last month, ET spoke with Alves, who revealed where she stands with Ma Mac today. 

“You gotta understand from whatever your mother-in-law hurdles are that you have to pass, you gotta put yourself in a situation where you can get out of it. You’re just gonna have to work it out. There’s no way out. But trust me, it’s worth it to get to the other side,” she said. 

And when it came to revealing their little tiff, Alves said her mother-in-law is a good sport. 

“Oh she loved it, Ma Mac loves the limelight,” she said. “She wants to be in the light. And it’s a true story, I wasn’t making it up, things like that happen. And I think the most important part is not necessary to be stuck on the story. We got to the other side, with joy, with laughter. And right now, she’s one of my best friends.” 

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